i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Can I bring some rope too? It's not too early for bondage talk, is it?
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize
