No, I can't hang out with Dave because he already has a girlfriend. The one with the tatoos of cherries on her "cherry." Yeah, she doesn't really make me feel spectacularly comfortable.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Rainbow fish was a wild success, got wasted at 6 gave away most my scales and made out with max from where the wild things are.You'd be so proud
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I walked in to you guys using a milk jug as a gravity bong
Surrounded by smaller versions of the same
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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