Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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