strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Can I color on your dick again?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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