And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I'm having a flashback of telling a guy that he was beautiful and graceful like a unicorn while playing shuffleboard.
I think I slept in the cheesecake last night. Either that or I had a wet dream. Whatever happened I need to wash my pants.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I'm always down for nudity.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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