It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
Randomize
