Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
