oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
