Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
How's everyone else's ass tattoo today?
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
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