I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
im about as happy as oj after his trial
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
I'm about 40% drunk. You know, not drunk enough to light the bar on fire, but drunk enough to let the cougar hit on me.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
