so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
