Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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