my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
