Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
You yelled "NICE PAJAMAS" at a construction worker wearing a reflective jumpsuit while we rode past on a bike taxi
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
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