i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
