Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
She kept saying my hands are a cupcake factory
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Randomize
