I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
