so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
So some drunk guy just tried to convince me with all of his passion that bacon is a color
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
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