At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
We had sex on a dog bed..
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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