Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
currently wearing a football players overly sized underwear. discovered a shot count on my leg. I'm a tank hahahhh
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
My Tinder date from last night is my Uber driver for tonight's Tinder date...neither of us said a word.
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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