He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
my cat ate my toast this morning while i was getting dressed. i can already tell today is going to suck.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
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