how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
While we were doing it he looked up at me and said "Does your husband fuck you this good?" Talk about a mood killer....
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