Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I wouldn't hesitate to give up my job to have regular bowel movements again
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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