Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
then he tried to convert me to islam
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
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