that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
Randomize
