you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
She always manages to outslut me. I can't keep up
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
My dick has a subreddit
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Just ordered a pregnancy test off amazon. Fuck 2019
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