Just mADE A PArabola og urine
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Ur dog was like a damn middle school chaperone this morning trying to lay between us after what he saw us do last night
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
well I didn't shave for the hot dilf I banged last week so I'm sure as hell not shaving for you. Sry
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
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