I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
