my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Ok I can't be your drugdealer AND booty call AND friend. It just doesn't work that way
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
