Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
I work with a guy that has a strong spanish accent. He just said "I have a plethora of ..." and I busted out into laughter b4 he finished his sentence b/c it reminded me of 3 amigos.
I literally made his dick bleed. How the fuck do you think it went?
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
The night is not complete until I am drnk and speaking to inanimate objects
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I figure blowing aggressively into a harmonica is better than screaming, "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME YOU SOCIOPATHIC SUCCUBUS" to my sister, in the middle of an auditorium, during my mothers college graduation ceremony.
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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