I looked at my own cervix.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
Friends don't let friends talk to people who live in Orlando. Sorry I've failed you.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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