i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Randomize
