so explain again why im purple
no
I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
dude i woke up sitting indian style with my face on the ground and my hand in a bucket of ice.
I love you, but you should know I'll always ditch you for weed.
I'm pretty sure my moms getting nailed in the bathroom right now while I'm chaperoning. God damn it.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
It's ok, it's locked within patented Sealrite technology. That puke is staying fresh
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