Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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