You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize