Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
i just made an omelette with the cheese and ham from a lunchables. and ketchup packets
julia child would be proud.
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
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