I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
You kept telling the cops that our ice luge was practice for the next winter olympics
It's sad the highlight of the night was you didn't electrocute yourself again.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
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