She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I intend to get homeless drunk
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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