she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
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