why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
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