id be glad to
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
your phone died, so you started bawling in the bar
yeah that sounds like me
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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