this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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