i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
She told me I should be a condom model.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
Randomize
