I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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