I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Under no circumstances is tits McGee to make that kind of decision about my life!
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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