I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
Found the puke drawer
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
