I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
I fucked her wearing an American flag. Now here I am, awake, naked, and flag less. How do I report this to the police?
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Randomize
