I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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