Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
EW FUCK GROSS GODDAMMIT I WENT DOWNSTAIRS AND MY GODDAMN BROTHER WAS FINGERING SOME GIRL ON THE FLOOR DOESN'T HE KNOW HE FUCKING LIVES WITH PEOPLE
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
