Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
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